Just where did Mom go? Cath wears some ugly footwear. The Crime of the Week is totes confusing.
But the burning question is -WHAT HAPPENED TO THE CHICKENS?? I suspected that Joe White would reappear and throughout Season 3, would transport them from safe house to safe house, dragging out the mystery until finally, in the season finale, Chin would open a door and say ‘Chicken?’
We open with a touching scene in the ocean – the service for Malia. Such a beautiful, moving ceremony. I thought when my time comes, I would like a ceremony like this. Until I saw the underwater shot of everyone sitting on their boards, legs dangling. And all I could think of was Shark! Because I live in West Oz, yo. We don’t have the title of the deadliest place in the world for shark attacks for nothing.
Chin scatters some ashes into the sea. They are the remains of Malia and the poor, burnt chickens. Malia was cremated, but the chickens were already beyond saving, so they chucked them in with her. So, Steph – your question has been answered!
Of course, the best part about this scene is McG’s bum on a board. Was he the ONLY guy out there wearing a rashie? I’m pretty sure all the other guys were shirtless, but for some reason, TPTB decided McG needed some sun protection. (Gracie, you should be proud.) No wait, Chin is also fully clothed.
There’s an armed robbery at the Aloha Tower Marketplace, a shootout, some HPD coppers go down, and one of the bad guys gets shot. His accomplices leave him, and make their getaway in an awesomely horse-powered taxi.
A car chase ensues (surprise!) I’m seriously rethinking any ideas of going to Honolulu on my next vacation. If I don’t get shot in the street, I’m likely to get run over during a police pursuit. HPD lose the bad guys (surprise!) The guy at the wheel of the taxi drives like a race car driver.
Chin stands looking forlornly out to sea, but we don’t care because we get shirtless McG. He and Cath are toweling off, and McG asks for a favour. He needs her to help him find his Mom. Even though last week he told Mom not to let anyone – even him – know where she flew off to. But because Mom shot holes in the floor instead of Wo Fat, McG now needs to know WTF she’s up to.
McG gets a phone call about the robbery and oh, look. The return of the overshirt. Boo. The bad guy who got shot has taken hostages and is offering the release of one of them in return for medical help. Kono goes in as a paramedic but the bad guy dies. So now there’s no chance of getting any information on his accomplices.
The robbery took place at an art gallery and back there, the owner tells Kono that some lithographs were taken. No cash was stolen. The lithos were only valued at $30k, not worth all the mayhem. There is a cargument in which Danny berates McG for his gung-ho attitude in sending them all in to the hostage situation. Because McG knew that it would all be ok in the end. The Amazing McGarrett. Oh, yes. Yes indeed. Totally bloody amazing. And hot. As hell.
McG receives a call from Max and they head off to a barbeque where the aforementioned taxi driver is the main course. Hope you like your meat well done, McG. Meat and McG in the same sentence – you’re welcome.
Danny teases Max about his cane – he kind of got on my nerves in this scene, teasing Max like that. But Max got the better of him. Go Max! (I’m trying to see how many times I can write ‘Max’ in a paragraph.)
The boys look for a fence for the artwork and visit August March to ask for his help in tracking down the robbers. March claims to know nothing, but says he will make some inquiries.
Cath is lounging at the bar of the Rack ‘Em Sports Club (ironic, because, as beautiful as she is, she doesn’t have much of a rack.) Is she stepping out on McG?? There’s Tony from 24. Hey, Tony – you just missed Michelle! (Tony and Michelle were married in 24. Michelle aka Malia just got her ashes scattered. With the chickens.)
Max is making soup. Danny is disgusted. Max has boiled the face off the getaway driver who was barbequed, (which will add an awesome flavour) and has digitally reconstructed his face. Max gets a match with Tyler McNamara, a retired stock car driver. Hence the badass driving skillz after the robbery.
The team head to McNamara’s house – which is beautiful. Is it just me, or did the palm trees outside look CGI? I fully expected to see a chopper and a giant claw pick the house up and drop it into the ocean. After searching McNamara’s house, the team discover that his daughter Karen has been kidnapped. AGAIN, Show?? How many kidnappings does this make?
So Tyler was driving the getaway car under duress. McG and Danny go to visit the Tyler’s ex-wife, and discover that Karen’s boyfriend was the dead robber.
Now we’re back at the Rack Less Sports Bar, and it seems like Tony has forgotten his password to – something – because Cath is asking him all his security questions. What street did you grow up on, what town are you from, what was your first pet’s name, who did you have a crush on when you were a teenager. I’m surprised she doesn’t ask him his mother’s maiden name?
Cath leaves the bar wearing some FUGLY boots (clearly, Cath and Kono go boot shopping together – ooh, I see a stick figure drawing coming soon!) She accesses the Witness Security Program website on her laptop and enters all the information she’s gleaned from Tony and resets his password for him. Because Tony is a government employee and it is apparent that government employee passwords do not need to contain at least one numeric , one symbol and a minimum six characters. Cath appears to find out where Mom is staying.
The team has ID’d the Kapule brothers as the accomplices in the robbery. August March visits Kimo who is some kind of mean motherf/cker, and requests his help. In something, I’m not sure what.
McG and August –with Danny in the BACK SEAT again – (McG is really getting payback for the dog sitting in the front) head out to Sand Island in search of the Kapule Brothers. When they arrive, with Chin and Kono, they find the brothers have been shot. One is dead, and Kono leans down to try and get information on the whereabouts of the kidnapped girl from the other brother, but he dies. (Remind me never to get Kono to help me when I’ve been shot. It doesn’t seem to end well.)
The lithographs are spread out on the table. Man, they are ugly. Kono finds one of the Kapule Brothers phones, and there are pics of them in front of the safe at the art gallery, posing as security guys. There are two pictures in the safe which aren’t on the list of stolen items the gallery owner gave to Kono.
Turns out the two pictures in question were originally stolen on December 7th, 1941 – the day Pearl Harbor was bombed, along with some other paintings. So the gallery owner’s Grandpa stole the paintings and started his own art gallery, but couldn’t offload these as they were too well known and valuable.
Another car chase. The gallery owner tries to outdrive the Camaro, but to no avail. When McG and Danny catch him, he is unaware of the kidnapping, and has done a deal with some guy he never actually met, to recover the stolen, stolen paintings.
Fong recovers a print from one of the paintings, and gets a match with August March.
McG and Danny interrogate March in the blue room. The bullet that killed Angela, the diamond girl, matches the bullets that killed the Kapule Brothers. And the gun belongs to March, who insists he’s not going back to jail, and wants to know what his options are. He offers to take McG and Danny to Karen’s location, and shows them a picture on his phone of Karen bound and gagged in the trunk of a car. (Judging by the use of duct tape, I’d say Adam has been hanging around Karen.)
McG, Danny and March, accompanied by two HPD cars, arrive at the scene. March points them in the direction where he says Karen is, and foolishly, they set off, leaving March standing IN THE MIDDLE OF THE ROAD. Where he becomes road kill. Hit by a truck. They have to scoop him off the road. They take him back to Max so he can make more soup.
McG decides that March deliberately led them in the opposite direction to where Karen really is, knowing that he was going to commit suicide. Kono and Chin discover that one of the Kapule Brothers rented a car that matched the specs of the ‘Proof of Life’ photo of Karen. So they organize for all long term parking structures to be inspected, find one where the car is, and now that Cath is land based, call on the people at Norsat to direct a satellite with thermal imaging to locate Karen in the trunk. Too easy?
They rush to the car, and all I can say is, if McG smooths my hair and speaks to me like that, I will gladly let Adam duct tape me and place me in the trunk. Karen and her mom are reunited.
Now we’re at the Tropics Bar and Grill, where the team and Max are having dinner and drinks. Chin is being all sad, looking out at the little lantern with Malia’s image, bobbing on the water. I try and see if there are any more lanterns with little chicken pictures on them, but no.
Kamekona arrives, looking like a Top Gun. He has a new business idea providing tourists with helicopter tours. Max doesn’t like his slogan ‘Come for the shrimp, stay for the helicopter tour.’ I think it’s catchy.
Danny goes to Chin and there is a lovely scene where Chin describes how Malia and he met, and Danny and Chin share a very tender, friendship filled moment. I love how Danny gets all choked up. He has redeemed himself in my eyes for his earlier teasing of Max.
Cath arrives and tells McG where Mom is.
Which happens to be here – on the island. She never left Oahu. I suspect she’s drinking tea somewhere, and hopefully practicing her shooting skillz.